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[catchacold]

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[boilover]

[Mick takes a long while to consider this before finally, he does pinpoint the moment in which he had to reject the casserole.]

That was the ninth time you knocked my fucking door that day. I thought you were lying just to get back in. [It was three updates on the chore wheel he was never going to do, two checking in moments, one mission update and then three social calls later, he wasn't feeling overly up to letting Ray in after that.] You should have come back later with two and left them outside the door, idiot. That's customary. Ain't it, Snart?

[catchacold]

I've never found you more attractive, Raymond.

[Said as deadpan as could be expected and then Leonard shrugs his shoulders at Mick's question before nodding.]

I ain't up on the casserole etiquette, but that's what they say.

[shrinkage]

[ ray's face pinches at len's comment, and then pinches even more as mick continues. ]

I've said it once, I'll say it a thousand times: the Waverider is not a hotel.

[boilover]

It ain't my house neither. Stop mothering me, you weirdo.

[Mick huffs because no, they are not having this discussion again.]

Look, do you want our help or do you want to discuss chores? [Honest to God, he will shove that chore wheel down your throat.]

[catchacold]

We're not discussing chores. You sound like an old married couple.

[This isn't even the stuff that would get him to be jealous, it's just ridiculous.]

Raymond. Just ask her if she wants to talk about it. Think that's how people do it.

[shrinkage]

[ ......ok so part of him wants to talk about this chore thing still. ]

I just--

[ he thinks better of it, and perches his butt on the edge of the bed. ]

But I can't fix it. I don't know what to do with a problem I can't even try to fix.

[boilover]

You're not supposed to fix it, you're just supposed to care. You know how to care, right?

[Mick doesn't know how to explain empathy to someone, he barely gets it himself.]

I always wanted to fix the shit going on with Snart and I never could. So I just gave a shit and tried to have his back when he needed me. I didn't fix nothing, I was just there. As a distraction, as back up, as a babysitter. You gotta be what you need to be for the people who need you and that changes all the damn time.

[There's a slight pause.]

To be clear, I'm not saying pretend to be someone else. Just adapt how to act.

[catchacold]

...when did he pretend to be someone else?

[He's sorry, but that statement definitely sounds like it has some history behind it. Hopefully more interesting history than that casserole thing.]

And why? Half the time you can barely even be yourself, Raymond.

[shrinkage]

[ ray pinches up again, eyes wide and nostrils flaring against his inability to speak and have it not result in his second death probably. ]

[boilover]

Nah. He didn't. Just ... saying, is all.

[Mick is also looking everywhere but Leonard. Oh fuck.

This was not good. They just had to say nothing.

Don't crack, Raymond. I swear to God, don't you dare tell Leonard Snart you stretched out his jacket and broke his gun.]

[catchacold]

[Instead of somehow breaking the tension, Leonard is completely silent.

Leaning forward. Looking at Ray, because he'll break easier.

Waiting.]

[shrinkage]

[ did it just get really warm in here? or cold? boy ray's collar feels real dern tight is he blinking a lot is that a thing why is he blinking so much all of a sudden

also does breathing heavier help

don't look at mick

don't do it don't look at him that's not-- oh god why is he looking at mick this was such a mistake mick mick buddy help please

help

helppp ]

[boilover]

[DO

NOT

SAY

ANYTHING

ABOUT

THE ILL THOUGHT OUT COSPLAY

Help yourself and stay quiet or he will make you eat your own underwear, you dumb nerd.]

[catchacold]

[Leonard exhales. It wouldn't be audible normally, but the room has just gotten very, very quiet. He turns his head to look at Mick, weight shifting already. The bed creaks quietly.

Once more his eyes end up on Ray.

Eyebrows arch.]

[shrinkage]

[ so have you guys ever been fucking around in chemistry and you were like

hey i might as well just warm up the beaker on the hotplate before i put the water in that'd totally make it go faster and save me time and you pour that nice cold water in and OH GOD THE BEAKER SHATTERED AND THERE'S GLASS IN MY EYE SOMEONE GET THE NURSE

yeah.

his eyes dart to len's face. then mick's. then the door... ]

[boilover]

[Yes, eye that door. Good boy.

Run

Now run out of it before Snart does anything.

Mick purposefully holds his own expression in neutral, not letting Leonard get anything from him. He's played this game before. It's that time Mick brought a whore to their safehouse all over again. Just gotta stay strong, play it cool and hope Leonard doesn't catch on that a glittery bimbo is straddling their couch right now.

Of course it didn't work out so well then either.

Not that Leonard and the whore didn't get on, they got on great. Too great. They left to go get froyo. Mick did not get his money's worth out of it and had to sleep on that glittery couch afterwards. He was shiny for weeks.

He should never have gotten seduced by the Sparkle Factory and their affordable whores.]

[catchacold]

[Mick's neutral expression gives away more than Mick realises. Mick's expression is never neutral, unless what's on his mind is decidedly not neutral.

But he also takes note of Ray's eyes and his hand lifts, releasing his arm, moving slowly.

Slowly.

Until it settles on Ray's shoulder, giving it the slightest of squeezes.]

Wanna get froyo?

[shrinkage]

[ ray's eyes scrunch shut in fear, and they s l o w l y open and find mick's face again and there's no way the panic isn't fully on display. his tiny bunny heart pounds away in his chest.

if he speaks, he's toast. he knows it. if he can just keep his mouth shut...

but boy howdy does he love froyo

still staring at mick, ray nods

sorry i'm sorry i'm so sorry ]

[boilover]

[Leonard knows.

Leonard knows

Abort. ABORT.

This is getting out of hand, he has to do something.

But there's nothing he can do.

Mick shakes his head but it's futile.

All he can do now is do what any smart person would do - prepare to throw Ray under the bus and blame him for everything. Solid plan. 10/10.]

[catchacold]

I'll bring you some back.

[With a sneer, that's all he says. Then he gets up, seemingly planning on simply walking out the door and leaving the two of them in his room.]

[shrinkage]

[ he jostles with the bed as len's weight comes up off of it and shoots mick a questioning glance.

is this a trick? ]

[boilover]

[This is not a trick.

This is attack.

This is basically like a tiger circling it's prey. He will come back and it will be 10x worse every time. They're trapped.

Mick has to do something to change this topic.]

I thought you were giving haircut advise?

[catchacold]

Chill and eat froyo. How's that not good advice?

[In all honesty, especially given who they are dealing with? It's not wrong.]

[shrinkage]

[ oh. huh. seems fine! ]

Could I have acai blueberry tart? Ooh-- or pistachio!

[boilover]

[......

wait

no

Leonard, don't leave him with this dingus.]

I think I need a beer. [Mick grabs a bottle off the side and gets up.] I hate cold things, you know that. [He whines over ice-cream all the damn time - it's too cold!!]