Babysitter's Club

[catchacold]

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[boilover]

We do it right.

You can't be. He's adorable and tiny. No one can be mad.

[catchacold]

I love your son. And his genius bottle pronunciation.

Do you want me to bring food? Is Lisa staying or leaving if I get there?

[boilover]

Lisa is staying, I guilted her a little. She may hold you.

Can you bring me some jars home?

[catchacold]

...why?

For Teddy? Yes. Any preferences?

[boilover]

I was talking about how you used to hold her like she's holding Teddy and I told that story about when we went to the park and you spent the last of your money buying her that ice-cream because she fell and hurt her knee. She got kind of teary eyed and cuddled Teddy.

He needs more mango and bananas and also some of that sweet potato and chicken he loves.

[catchacold]

Ohh, full on going after the tears. Mean, but effective.

He has your tasted to an almost disturbing degree, Mick, you know that?

What do the rest of you fancy? No meat for your nerd, I know.

[boilover]

I play dirty when she's a stubborn asshole about things. She's upset with you because you gave her a look.

He's just like me. He's amazing.

Pizza, we all voted pizza. No meat. Fuck, that little nerd is killing me.

[catchacold]

A look, huh? I'll better my ways.

He's beautiful and amazing, just like you. I agree.

I'll get a meat one for you.

[boilover]

I told her you always give me looks. I ignore them.

We are adorable. Lisa got us matching shirts.

You're so good to me.

[catchacold]

Sometimes you pout.

She loves you two. She always wanted a little brother.

I just like it when you like me.

[boilover]

Sometimes you're a little bitch.

She adores Teddy so much, I'm kind of worried it's giving her ideas, she keeps saying she wants one. I keep telling her no. I'm trying to get her to date Hartley.

I always like you, handsome.

[catchacold]

You're just a perfect angel.

Hartley's gay, Mick. I caught Lisa giving Hartley tips on how to attract gay guys, because he is evidently completely clueless what they'd find attractive. It's kind of cute.

More when I bring you good food.

[boilover]

Always. I'm so saintly.

I know, he told me but it'd be great if she dated a gay guy. Then she'd never get pregnant. I wish he'd stop being into Axel. I hate that he fell for him. Fuck sake.

You bring me such good food.

[catchacold]

On the plus side, he knows what Axel does for a living and I doubt he wants to get mixed up in that. Rentboys don't really do boyfriends and you can tell Hartley just wants someone whose hand he can hold and whose eyes he can look into. Sarcastic shit, but a romantic. It's cute, Axel likes him a lot too.

I'm a good boyfriend. You can stare lovingly at me.

[boilover]

Good. I don't want him being badly influenced by him. Axel is a dodgy kid and Hartley is a puppy dog, he's a great kid. I want to keep him away from that shit. Keep on being a good boy.

I always do <3

[catchacold]

As long as they don't kiss, we're in the clear. Though they may have kissed already.

Aw, you'll make me blush.

[boilover]

... WHAT?

IT BETTER NOT HAVE BEEN NEAR BY LITTLE BOY WHAT THE FUCK I AM NOT PAYING THEM TO MAKE OUT

[catchacold]

Like we didn't have our first time right after tucking Lis in.

Anyway, I don't know if they kissed or not. Ask. Hartley's not a bad liar, but in this case he'd blush.

[boilover]

HE BLUSHED.

IF AXEL WASN'T HOLDING TEDDY, HE'D BE FUCKING DEAD.

[catchacold]

You can't keep them from kissing.

But fine, we're in trouble. Hartley wants to date Axel, I bet you.

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I CAN IF I WANT TO.

Don't tell me that. He's a whore, Snart. A fucking whore. He doesn't do drugs now but he drinks like a fish.

[catchacold]

I'm not saying it's a good idea, I'm just saying what I think Hartley's thinking. But Axel will stop being a whore. He's not the worst. He'll straighten out.

Though if he likes Hartley, that explains why he's suddenly more receptive to the idea of maybe going back to school.

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You keep saying that and he doesn't. You just keep saying he's a good kid. I didn't believe it when he tried to give you that fucking blow job and I still don't believe it now.

He told Lisa just now that school is for nerds and he was going to find a way to buy a degree.

[catchacold]

I'm sure it would have been a good blowjob.

What, I have faith in your kid, why don't you have faith in mine? He'll be fine.

[boilover]

I don't have faith in people who tried to suck my boyfriend off. Also he calls me Mickey sometimes and that really bugs me.

He likes pineapple on pizza. Evil.